THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
I wanna passion pit in your ass
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
What happened to my face?
You kneed yourself in the eye during the Harlem Shake.
It was impressive.
I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath"
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
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