I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
wanna go halves on a baby?
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
A client gave me a bottle of vodka today. And he was hot with a beard. It's like he knows my soul.
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
Randomize
