I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
Randomize
