I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
URGENT INPUT I'm at a renesance fair after party and I'm 100% lined up to fuck their sword swallower OR their contortionist. Dont say both - which direction doth I roll?
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
I gave my girlfriend a ring to celebrate our anniversary, she thought It was an engagement ring. Now im getting married and I don't know what to do.
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
He graduated. He’s not my GA anymore. He’s just the 24 year old that’s helping me put a sexless marriage in the rear view mirror by exploring the Kama sutra with me
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