Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
i lost my phone in the process of getting a condom out of my hair
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
I just woke up in bed, rolled over, and found a whole pizza.
this is the second day in a row.
Oh. Yeah. It's the same pizza then.
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
Randomize
