Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
Yeah I'm buying him lunch right now because I shot him with the fire extinguisher last night
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
I feel like my entire body is ashamed of me today
You're a god amongst men today
there is another microwave in the elevator.
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