He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
Randomize
