saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
In case you were wondering, taking me to see beauty and the beast in theaters would totally get you an unsolicited sloppy beej in the parking lot afterwards.
You should probably take note of that and make it happen.
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
Hey you remember last Super Bowl when I sent you a pic of my testicles? Memories...
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
You tried to tip the Uber driver with a meatball sub. Then, when he refused your meatball sub...you demanded he take you to the corner with the hookers. The valet has your keys and water balloons. I'm glad you're only in Chicago for the weekend.
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
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