if any two of us come back from the bar and aren't getting laid we will systematically destroy everything in the kitchen
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
There's a middle eastern man wearing a cow costume with tequila coming out of his udders, but I'm not sober enough to feel uncomfortable with it.
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
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