Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
Am I really in your phone as Asshole Jesus??
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
Sexting gets boring after a while. I'm eating a sandwich right now and googling 'sexting ideas' and just copy/pasting lines.
It's a good sandwich though.
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
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