This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
Finally hooked up with her. She bought me tacos after because "she can do better in a bed". You're gonna be my best man.
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
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