i don't plan on having that self control this summer
Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
So I just saw a commercial for tickle me Elmo furry gloves. And I thought hmm I bet I could jerk off with those. Is that a sign of deepseated charachter issues?
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
I think weed is turning my hair brown
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
Randomize
