yo i stole a wine glass from the ritz but i spilled wine on my hundo dolla shirt
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
I just creeped on air mattress guy's facebook and discovered his ex is the trifecta of evil: tiny, cute, and blonde.
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
Randomize
