Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
First table when you walk in. Can't miss us. I'm wearing a feather boa and a green hat
You had me at first table
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
You're going to find someone that you love very much and that loves you, and then you're gonna find an additional person that you literally can't stop staring at from across the room. I feel very confidently about that
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
Randomize