I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
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