If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
idk how I feel so profoundly understood by someone whose latest tweet is "labia majora's mask." but I do.
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
Randomize