haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
so i was trying to be sexy and unzip his pants with my teeth. i got my lip caught in the zipper and it bled for a good 15 min, totally a mood killer.
it's not cheating when I paid for it
she wants to wait til the kids are asleep so im just shotgunning the parents beers in the pillow fort. I love fucking babysitters
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
it is my last wish that my tale be published posthumously as a warning to anyone thinking of eating burger king at nine am
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
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