spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
The waitress asked if you wanted white or brown, and you said "Isn't it all the same color when it's toasted?". She stared at you for about 20 seconds before she decided that you weren't fucking with her.
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
Randomize
