I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
My mom comes home from her weekend with her lesbian co-workers and asks "You wanna know how I got these bruises?" I've never been more torn about anything EVER.
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
Randomize
