That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
I'm never drinking with you again. I woke up in Midtown with a 7' tall Norwegian rugby player named Lexie. Never. Again.
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
I just woke up on the floor with an empty handle in one hand and a piece of my ceiling in the other. #classy
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