No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
Just drug him and when he wakes up be like "you just woke up from a coma, we've been married for the past five years." It'll be like the Vow but fucked up.
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
I don't know what part of my sober brain thought it was a good idea to get stoned when I can barely walk with crutches as it is, but that part is stupid.
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
Today would have been my 8th wedding anniversary and I woke up with a hot European guy in my bed. Divorce has it's perks.
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
Do you remember me asking for jerk off videos from Tinder guy?
Nah I don't remember that being part of the criteria
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
Randomize
