Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
i guess its not very common for a paramedic to have to revive someone who was struck by a falling shampoo bottle while getting off from the bathtub faucet.
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
Is this like a preordered booty call?
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
Randomize
