getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
high enough to want to lick peanut butter off of Michael Buble's vocal chords as he serenades me.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
My mom just called hysterical. She and her sister found my dead grandma's vibrator.
The apple don't fall far from that tree.
My brother and I have had one conversation in the past like 3 weeks and it was about what it would be like as a sentient butt plug
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
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