mom just said that her bf is good in bed. fml.
i am watching a movie about a vagina with teeth and then you sent that to me while im eating sushi.
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize
