hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
i just looked at my contacts and realized i saved the pizza hut girl's number as "fckucin pizza" the other night.
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
Man. Apparently I blacked out between the 4th margarita and my air mattress. Asleep in my jeans at 10pm. Mom outdrank me again.
You used your chihuahua as a pillow screaming "HE'S A PILLOW AND A PET" and proceeded to puke in the dog bed
What should've been a 10 minute beer run turned into her having a 40 minute mental breakdown in my car while in the parking lot. She then asked if she could live at my house and be my girlfriend. Her finishing act was stealing my peanut m&m's.
Well, when a girl introduces herself as "stormy" and gets your number from her boyfriends phone, I'd say that your situation is to be expected.
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
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