Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
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