I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
I told him to come back in 5mins cause i needed to take a few more shots before i could talk to him
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
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