all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
Well you really should've thought of that before you painted your walls the same color as your toilet
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
Jealous. I want an iud. Maybe there's a late night bodega that'll insert one for me
There's a little game I've come up with since the mess of a party I had; it's called "tinsel or condom wrapper? (or: what's that on the floor?)"
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
