My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
you left your shoes but remembered to take your vodka. i see where your priorities are.
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
this must be what syphilis tastes like
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
i told him the only way i'd fuck him was if he saved me during the zombie apocolypse and took me to a tastefully decorated yet impenetrable hideout.
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
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