She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
last night a police horse bit me when i was wasted. even the animal kingdom knows i'm no good
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Randomize
