can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
when i went to the store to buy my pregnancy test they were giving carnations to all the moms and they gave me one and said "just in case"
Do you remember calling me a cuntasaurus rex last night?
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
I told you I couldn't sleep because of the speed and you rolled over and replied "shh. just pretend."
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
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