I just met a guy from Australia at the bar. I asked him what it was like down under and he told me if I went home with him he'd let me find out. I love Australians.
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
She was a cheerleader in college and President of her sorority and now she’s a sales rep for a pharmaceutical corporation. “High maintenance hot” doesn’t even begin to explain it
But dear lord is it worth it
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