If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
Had sex with the ex last night. Regretting to begin in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1... WHYYYYYYYYYY!
"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
Randomize
