How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
Randomize
