Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
You just sent a mass text asking if anyone ever drank the blood of a goat in the glorious name of Satan...after that we confiscated any writing utensil
Randomize
