careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
Someone just said “I need to use up this money before I’m tits up under the dirt” so I think I’m going to start using that in my daily vocabulary.
We showed up to the ER to pick him up and I was still wearing face paint from the game. Then I threw up in the sink. Those doctors did not like us at all.
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
