he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
The kids I taught this morning even knew i was drunk. One of them even said, and I quote, "You smell like my dad after he goes bowling."
I think I ruined Robin and Mikes anniversary. I walked in on them fucking, accidentally broke the necklace he gave her, and I stole the keg from their party. Not in that order
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
Randomize
