we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
Randomize
