I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
Just got a blowjob to the theme of Bohemian Rhapsody as the sun was rising. I should just kill myself because ill never top this moment.
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
WHY ARE THERE NO BLACK EMOJIS? I CAN NEVER PROPERLY IDENTIFY MYSELF.
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Randomize