i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
i was so proud for not passing out at the same time as usual. i screamed that i had a "new personal best!" then some jackass explained daylight savings.
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
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