Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
They found a chair, duct taped me to it, then gave me a bottle of vodka to 'make me feel at home'
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
There are so many birds around me. And squirrels. I feel like that chick from Enchanted...but like if she had a dick and made poor life decisions.
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
Randomize
