Dude, she's so old there's a chalk outline where her reproductive organs used to be.
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Randomize
