it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
You made out with my dog and told me he tasted like a rainbow.
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
The sigh of relief when u realize none of your drunk texts will result in permanent damage
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
Randomize
