everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
you googled " I want to buy a live ostrich". I'd say you were pretty wasted.
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
Let's put a bunch of beers in a backpack and shotgun them in a Red Lobster bathroom
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
Randomize
