Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
I wish Morgan Freeman narrated my life.
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
I save people's lives for a living, but I want to ruin his marriage.
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
I swear to god, allah, buddah and motherfucking oprah winfrey... if I have to stay here any longer because you are holding us up I will choke you out.
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
What part of “the stripper has a gun, we need to leave” is confusing you? She’s drunk, she’s fucking crazy and NOW SHE’S PACKING HEAT!
Randomize
