I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
I emailed the police apartment to apologize to the officer from last night. I practically threw a hissy fit because he wouldn't hug me.
It was "against protocol"
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
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