Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
I never actually go in the club. I get in line, hit on a chick, and convince her to come drink all she wants for free at my house.
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
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