So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
Randomize
