OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
It was good sex. She was screaming so much I didn't know whether or not my name was Matt or God.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
I'm smoking a bowl in my bathtub. I'm meant to be alone.
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
we're so committed to being not committed
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
You ever have a fart follow you around?
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
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