I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
it's not cheating when I paid for it
stop texting me from phones in the verizon store and pretending to be guys i talked to when i was drunk. its confusing.
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
Next time I think it’s a good idea to hook up with any of your wife’s family members or friends just kick me in my dick
Randomize
