I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
remind me to tell you about the ham sandwich empire im building
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
Yoooooo, the fat magician married the chick I dumped a beer on after I got pissed he was flirting with her in front of me
Randomize
